Porgie & Mr Jones

291 Auburn Rd, Hawthorn
Ph: 9882 2955
Open: every day, 8am-4.30pm-ish

STOP press: the search for Melbourne’s best café is over.

At least in my world the search is over and, in an extreme stroke of luck, the café in question is within a hop, step and jump of my pad.

Porgie and Mr Jones is discretely tucked away in Hawthorn’s Auburn Rd shopping strip and has captured perfectly that illusive café vibe where everything is stripped back to basics yet still manages to ooze style. Many have tried to achieve this but I’m yet to dine in one that’s hit the mark as much as P&MJ.

Exposed brick, road signs hanging on the wall and terracotta pot plants mounted on steel holders start it off, a shelf of cookbooks behind the counter add to it and a cane basket of Noisette bread for sale near the door finishes the look off nicely.

It’s the kind of joint I’d love to be at the helm of but until my dreams turn to reality I’ll have to be content with being a regular customer.

And regular I certainly am. I visited three times last week and with each visit I fell more in love with the menu. P&MJ is open for lunch but I’m yet to tear myself away from the breakfast offerings.

I think my favourite so far is the signature dish of smashed avocado with thyme-buttered mushrooms and house-marinated fetta on toasted wholegrain bread ($13.90 or $15.90 with a poached egg on top, below). There’s plenty of avocado on the plate and the creaminess of the fetta almost rivals Meredith goat’s fetta, which is no mean feat.

The full breakfast with eggs, bacon, pork and fennel chipolatas, slow-roasted tomatoes and thyme-buttered mushrooms ($16.90, below) is a winner and while I’m yet to try it my sticky-beaking skills tell me the bircher muesli with cinnamon poached pears and cleo’s honeyed yoghurt ($9.90) is another gem.

But perhaps the most spectacular dish is the toasted banana bread with rosewater poached fruits, maple syrup mascarpone and crushed pistachios ($11.90). It is divine to look at, delicious to devour and, dare I say it, but it could well be Melbourne’s best brecky dish.

P&MJ even caters for the hung over with a glass of Berocca for $3 and the environmentally-aware and diet-conscious are looked after with organic, free-range eggs and – where possible – local ingredients.

I could rave about P&MJ forever. Instead (as much as it pains me to share this neighbourhood secret) I’m going to leave this review here and recommend as strongly as possible to check it out for yourself. It only opened in November and something tells me it’s well on the way to legendary status.

(Just in case you’re wondering the funky name comes from two of the three café’s owners: Georgina (Georgie) Smith and Jason Jones.)

10/10

- zoe

The Botanical

169 Domain Rd
South Yarra
9820 7888
Mon-Fri From 7am
Sat-Sun From 8am


IT'S been found! A contender for Melbourne's best bircher. Surprisingly right under my nose at the good old Bot. Not only is the Domain Rd stalwart a top spot for an afternoon champagne or a fancy steak - it boasts the most incredible bircher ($8.50).

A stunning crunchy combo of grated apple, hazelnuts, sunflower seeds and more goodies mixed through a delicious chunky texture of soft soaked rolled oats, topped with rhubarb compote gets my vote. Not gluggy or overpowering, it was the best I've tried yet - and i am always trying.


Mr Maximilian Bircher-Benner knew what he was doing when he invented bircher muesli back in the 1800s. The Swiss doctor believed a diet rich in raw fruit, vegetables and nuts was essential for good health. He was served up a form of bircher on a hike by shepherds alps and proceeded to serve it to his patients.

Lucky for us, Melbourne has adopted Mr Bircher's invention with gusto. And I get to continue my love affair with bircher as I hunt down the best.

The Bot could have got lucky but back a second and third time, proves its bircher is genuine gold. The porridge also gets the thumbs up - but unlike most places, the large actually means just that ($8.50). My friend wished for the small ($5.50) despite the yummy mix of bananas, rhubarb and maple syrup.

The Bot isn't cheap. But as its loyal clientele know, brekky and coffee is a more affordable way to experience this stellar eaterie. Warning - brekky finishes at 11am.


Bircher: 9.5/10


- Kate

Carousel Café

22 Aughtie Dve
Albert Park Lake
(03) 8646 6008
Open: 8am – 4pm daily

THE Carousel café is a top spot to perv at celebrity weddings going on next door in the posh Carousel restaurant. I know because I did it recently.

Aussie swimmer Grant Hackett was getting hitched to pop starlet Candice Alley amid a media circus at Carousel. As a member of that circus I got comfortable in the adjoining café to watch the fun and what a good move that was.

While the celebrity couple chose to hide behind curtains to avoid prying cameras, the glorious view of the lake and city skyline was mine to enjoy from the café’s timber balcony.

Subsequent visits have shown the revamped Carousel delivers more than B-grade celeb nuptials and doses of cheeky charm from the café’s spunky waiters make the experience super fun for those of us not members of the celebrity world.

The modern, chic setting is completed with splashes of colour from divine French (Basque) linen cushions. In my mind, attention to detail is what makes this place tick. A bit of research reveals John Van Haandel, responsible for Stokehouse, Circa and Comme, is behind the operation, along with catering company Food&Desire.

In charge of food is executive chef Owen O’Neil and sous chef Frenchman Yvan Meunier, formerly of the Boathouse in Sydney.

The menu is seriously good with standouts like home-made spicy lamb sausage rolls w/ quince chutney & leafy salad ($12) and the carousel mezze plate which changes daily, featuring the chef’s selection of tapas-style morsels w/ grilled olive ciabatta ($16). Daily specials and a quality but wine list top it off.

We went back for all day breakfast last week and were not disappointed with the new winter menu. The Carousel brekky – toasted pide with scrambled eggs, tomato pesto, sautéed mushrooms & crispy bacon ($14) – garnered praise from a hungry brother-in-law.

I was excited by the Bircher muesli ($5). With a perfect creamy texture, this Bircher is not overpowering or glutinous. I can’t put my finger on why it’s so good, but it’s ranking high on my list of Melbourne’s best.

Poached eggs on toasted muffins, smoked salmon, baby spinach, tarragon aioli, and slow roasted tomatoes ($15.0) and the croque monsieur toasted high tin sourdough with smoked leg ham, gruyere and Dijon mustard ($10.5) got the thumbs up from other dining companions.

Prams are welcome as are dogs, trendy types, families and fitness fanatics who have earned themselves a feast after a run around the lake. So be warned, Sunday brunch can get manic.

This place is a winner. Get to the lake. Now.

8/10

- Kate